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jencatIt feels kinda weird, actually going to the cinema again on a regular basis. Not that I'm complaining, mind, it's just that the truly awful films are slipping back into the mix with it...
Well, X Files wasn't awful, to be fair. It was a particularly daft attempt at grafting a plot on to somewhere it didn't want to be, and some of the dialogue was excrutiating, but I really did love Chris Carter for his wonderfully shippy vision... There was much squeeing on my part, let's just say. And much WTF-ery from me and my non-fan mate at Billy Connolly being Serious Aktor. Hee.
But The Mummy 3: TombDragonWhatsit... now that was awful. Apparently written by muppets who had never watched the first two films, and cast by blind, deaf imbeciles (Maria Bello doing a bad Rachel Weizs impression?! Seriously? Was that the BEST you could come up with?! Did you hear her accent?). It was almost impressive the way they butchered the character relationships quite so enthusiastically, coupled with a plot that made precisely no sense, and was seven ways of boring in going about it.
Soooo many burning bits of awfulness that had me sinking down in my seat and trying to pretend it wasn't happening, but the Brit moppet from Returns now morphed into a very American moron... that was pretty bad. Jet Li's agent should get kudos for managing to secure joint top billing for what is essentially a cameo (ooh, first five mins of the film where they steal bits of Hero and Crouching Tiger before he turns into BadCGI Chocolate Monster Mummy, and then pops up again at the end). Spending the entire rest of the film not appearing in person or doing the mummy voice... and yet apparently star of the show!)
And oh, Michelle Yeoh... did you even read the script before you signed up?! I'm still waiting to hear exactly what my friend's Chinese housemate thought of the seriously dodgy version of China, but I get the impression she wasn't amused.
And Yetis... why did it have to be Yetis? High-fiving Yetis, no less... The mind boggles.
I'm seriously looking forward to Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day next week... what a cast! and frilly frou-frou pre-war London stuff. It looks shiny.
Of course, I still have to see Dark Knight again (can't believe I've left it this long, really) but I can probably live without seeing Mamma Mia ever again, really. The whole Pierce Brosnan/Colin Firth casting had me hiding under the seat every time they started singing. Although, Meryl Streep, on a clifftop, belting out Winner Takes It All... kinda rocked. I could watch that bit again.
And now to spend the whole weekend at MovieCon, pretending it's anything like San Diego and fighting through the hordes of rampaging Twilight fans...
Well, X Files wasn't awful, to be fair. It was a particularly daft attempt at grafting a plot on to somewhere it didn't want to be, and some of the dialogue was excrutiating, but I really did love Chris Carter for his wonderfully shippy vision... There was much squeeing on my part, let's just say. And much WTF-ery from me and my non-fan mate at Billy Connolly being Serious Aktor. Hee.
But The Mummy 3: TombDragonWhatsit... now that was awful. Apparently written by muppets who had never watched the first two films, and cast by blind, deaf imbeciles (Maria Bello doing a bad Rachel Weizs impression?! Seriously? Was that the BEST you could come up with?! Did you hear her accent?). It was almost impressive the way they butchered the character relationships quite so enthusiastically, coupled with a plot that made precisely no sense, and was seven ways of boring in going about it.
Soooo many burning bits of awfulness that had me sinking down in my seat and trying to pretend it wasn't happening, but the Brit moppet from Returns now morphed into a very American moron... that was pretty bad. Jet Li's agent should get kudos for managing to secure joint top billing for what is essentially a cameo (ooh, first five mins of the film where they steal bits of Hero and Crouching Tiger before he turns into BadCGI Chocolate Monster Mummy, and then pops up again at the end). Spending the entire rest of the film not appearing in person or doing the mummy voice... and yet apparently star of the show!)
And oh, Michelle Yeoh... did you even read the script before you signed up?! I'm still waiting to hear exactly what my friend's Chinese housemate thought of the seriously dodgy version of China, but I get the impression she wasn't amused.
And Yetis... why did it have to be Yetis? High-fiving Yetis, no less... The mind boggles.
I'm seriously looking forward to Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day next week... what a cast! and frilly frou-frou pre-war London stuff. It looks shiny.
Of course, I still have to see Dark Knight again (can't believe I've left it this long, really) but I can probably live without seeing Mamma Mia ever again, really. The whole Pierce Brosnan/Colin Firth casting had me hiding under the seat every time they started singing. Although, Meryl Streep, on a clifftop, belting out Winner Takes It All... kinda rocked. I could watch that bit again.
And now to spend the whole weekend at MovieCon, pretending it's anything like San Diego and fighting through the hordes of rampaging Twilight fans...
m3
Date: 2008-08-15 05:50 am (UTC)Peter Travers
Rolling Stone
http://www.rollingstone.com/reviews/movie/22126971/review/22126827/the _mummy_tomb_of_the_dragon_emperor
martial-arts superstar Jet Li triumphs as the mostly wordless evil Emperor Han of ancient China, a glowing magma spirit locked in a terra cotta shell.
Jane Horwitz
Washington Post
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/07/31/AR2008 073100734.html
Still, Li makes a great villain, using his powers to create fire, ice and other elements.
Edward Douglas
Coming Soon
http://www.comingsoon.net/news/weekendwarriornews.php?id=47377
Toward the end of The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, Jet Li and Michelle Yeoh launch into a vigorous sword fight — and what a grand pleasure it is to watch these two world-class stars in action again...Their duel atop the Great Wall of China is a reunion of titans, an Old Timers' Day for two actor-athletes still in their sinuous prime. Forgive the effusions of an alter-kocker fanboy, but the flinty glamour of Li and Yeoh — buttressed by the stolid, sneering presence of top Hong Kong villain Anthony Wong Chau-sang (who in 1993 appeared in 15 films!) — is the best reason to catch this third in the series of Indiana Jones knockoffs.
Richard Corliss
TIME
http://www.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1828343,00.html
A memorably badass Jet Li.
Nathan Rabin
AV Club
http://www.avclub.com/content/cinema/the_mummy_tomb_of_the_dragon